A Piece Of Me Died That Day

It's Thanksgiving 2018. My heart aches for both of you.
What happened to my loved ones who went before?
I can't find you. I don't know where you've gone.
Are you safe? Are you waiting for us?
One day, I hope you'll both be waiting for me by the River of Love.
Sometimes I want to pick up the phone and call you.
I want to tell you everything that's happened and hear your voice.
I don't know what number to dial to reach you.
I don't know where to wander to find you.
I don't think I'll ever be ready to let go of your love & our life.
The sufferings lingers on.
I try, but I can't seem to fix anything and everything is broken.
God help us for we are lost.


		If I want to grieve for the rest of my life; that's really none of your business.

The Long Reaching Effects One day the sound of rain will no longer elicit fear. ... sleeping in the church ... She can't even get to safety. She can just hold on. Waiting out the storm.

	When Angels Weep Mary Margaret Heerlein-De Shon "Punk" February 15, 1931 - December 4, 2006 Donald Dale De Shon June 23, 1929 - January 30, 2009 It's 2016 and my heart still aches. ~ Baby Come Back ~ Your Meemo Loves You! always...


I made the mistake when I was on Facebook of posting a photo of my Dad's old leisure suit jacket. I got only a couple of articles of Dad's clothing when he died. I still have what I have and don't have any desire to donate them to charity or throw them out. Dad's leisure suit jacket was from the 70's. He died January 30, 2009. That jacket had hung in his closet in plastic wrap from the dry cleaners for over 40 years. If he didn't throw it out, I didn't want to, either. I could still smell Dad on that jacket. Anyway, a woman I used to be close to, who was in my wedding posted a comment telling me to donate it to charity. She said she held on to her parent's things and ended up throwing them out. She said she felt selfish that she had kept them. I rebutted with something and she came back and scolded me like I was a child. She informed me that I needed to "move on"; which is a comment I come unglued over. It's not as though I kept all his underwear, socks, jammies, shirts, coats, slacks, suits, shoes, belts, etc. I had 3 items. His leisure suit jacket was 40 years old and he weighed 230 lbs at the time. Who in 2016 would wear a leisure suit from the 70's and might be Dad's same size? Nobody! His belt has "De SHON" branded on it. Like that's something they are going to fight over at a thrift store. Hell, it probably wouldn't bring 10 cents at most. His work shirt has his old company patch & his name embroidered on it. It's got frayed cuffs and the fabric is thin from wear. The thrift would probably cut it up for scrap. So shooting off her mouth, only made me angry and I deleted & blocked her. Grief is a very complex and individualized expression of the heart. No one can tell another how long they are allowed to grieve or what personal items they can keep or discard. Your pain isn't the same as mine. You live your life and leave me the Hell alone to live mine. I DECIDE what is best for me.

“I go to bed at 9:00 p.m., but I don’t fall asleep until 2:00 a.m. I keep thinking; what am I doing here? Why am I not at home where I belong? All of our things are gone. Our house is so close, yet strangers are living there. Why is this happening to me? Why am I made to suffer? Why do so many steal from me? I always thought we were a close family, but I was wrong. Oh My God, I was wrong! How could I have been so terribly wrong? Homelessness is an unbelievable culture shock. ~ keeping faith ~ ~ I just have me. ~ ~ I will survive this bump in the road. ~ ~ I will flourish & thrive. ~

	"Count Your Blessings & Smile" by: George Formby May 31, 1940